Random Omegle Chats

[Random Bald Guy]

This thread is for any weird, normal, or anyways interesting omegle/chat logs you've particiapted in and wish to share.

I'll start:

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You: wassup?

Stranger: IM GARY MOTHAFUCKIN OAK

You: well, I like shorts, they're comfy and easy to wear

You: I see you're not wearing shorts

Stranger: WELL I'M THE POKEMON MASTER!! RED CAN GO CUM INTO A MAGIKARP CAUSE THEYRE BOTH USELESS

You: Blue was Red's rival, not gary

You: Even my shorts would know that

You: Shorts are comfy and easy to wear, why aren't you wearing them?

Stranger: Yes but the meme is gary mothafuckin oak and ash is an asshole and I dont consider him to exist..and my shorts can't contain my girth

You: wow you force a meme, thats like wearing pants

You: you should wear shorts, they're comfy and easy to wear

You: would you like to wear my shorts with me?

Stranger: I ALSO FORCE BITCHS WITH MY GIRTH!

Stranger: AND NO

You: c'mon

Stranger: IM GARY OAK

You: you know you wanna wear my shorts with me

You: I'll even let you touch my ekans

Stranger: This has reached a whole new level of weird fetishes, anyway i'm Gary Oak, off to become a pokemon master! smell ya later

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[reaux]

hahahahaha!

[synge]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You and the stranger both like mlp.
You: HI! I'M Pinkamina Diane Pie!
You: What'cha doing?
You: Huh, huh?
Stranger: UMM
Stranger: UHH
Stranger: EATING CANDY!
You: Yeeeeeeah? *squints*
You: Wait, you ARE?
You: Without ME?
Stranger: I eat alone.
You: But, uh, oh, I know!
You: If I do a little dance
Stranger: And by the way my name is Doctor Whooves.
You: And I trot all around
You: You'll share your candy and I like that sound!
You: Wait, you're what?
Stranger: Who said I was sharing.
You: It's a song! The song said so!
You: Songs don't lie!
You: I just made it up!
Stranger: *Eats candy*
You: So it MUST be true!
You: *Dances all around you*
Stranger: I didn't pinkie promise.
You: That's okay!
Stranger: Good.
You: Wait, mister....
You: Huh?
You: How do you know about Pinkie Promises?
Stranger: ...
You: *Peeeeeers*
You: Weeeeel?
You: *I've got my eye on you, mister! I mean doctor!*
You: Hey, I know!
Stranger: That's cool.
You: What's my daily recommended dose of CANDY, Doctor?
Stranger: *Looks at candy*
You: You're a Doctor so you have to prescribe!
Stranger: What's your illness?
You: *Bounce bounce bounce*
You: I'M REALLY REALLY HYPER!
You: And like you have candy!
You: I'm getting the....
Stranger: Hmm.
You: *Pops up into the air and swells up! She starts popping like there's popcorn popping inside her*
You: DOCTOR I'M GONNA EXPLODE!
Stranger: *Gives you candy*
Stranger: Fine.
You: Really?
Stranger: *Takes out another bag*
Stranger: Yes.
You: *Deflates and lands back down safely on the ground*
You: Oooh, CANDY!
You: Thank you!
Stranger: *Puts on fez*
You: *Noms on the candy, getting it all over her snout* It's delicious!
Stranger: It's called "Jellybaby"
You: Really?
You: I LOVE IT!
You: I LOVE YOU, JELLYBABY FAIRY!
Stranger: Don't call me that.
You: Why not?
You: It's a reallllly nice name!
Stranger: *Takes your candy*
You: What?
Stranger: That's why.
You: *sits back on her haunches and starts crying*
You: Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
You: *Makes puddles on either side of her from geysers of tears*
Stranger: ............
Stranger: *Offers you candy*
You: *Perks up and stops crying immediately*
You: *Looks at you excitedly*
You: Really, for me?
You: YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE!
You: *Lunges forward and snaps candy away from you*
You: MINE ALL MINE HAHAHAHA!
You: You're the best Candy F...
You: Oh wait
You: Ummmm
You: I mean THANK YOU!
You: *Noms on Jelly Babies*
Stranger: Do you promise not to overreact when I take away your candy?
You: Umm....
Stranger: Wait...
You: *Puts a hoof to her muzzle and closes one eye thoughtfully*
You: NO I DON'T!
Stranger: Do you promise not to overreact when I give candy is what I meant.
You: Huh?
You: Who's overreacting?
Stranger: *Stares at you*
You: *Stares back*
You: You're funny!
Stranger: How about I give you candy and you don't overreact.
You: *Leans her head closer, almost touching her nose to yours, trying to win the staring contest*
You: *Snaps out of it*
You: Huh? More candy? For ME?
Stranger: IF!
Stranger: You don't overreact.
You: OH!
You: Uhmmm......
You: *Tilts her head and stares up into space for a second*
You: *Looks back to you*
You: Okay.
Stranger: Do you promise?
You: I mean sure!
You: I do! *Sits back on her haunches and lifts a hoof to her chest.* Pinkie Promise!
Stranger: Good.
Stranger: I Pinkie promise as well.
You: You DO?
You: But you can't give yourself candy, that's Silly!
Stranger: Yes.
Stranger: *Facehoof*
Stranger: I mean I promise that I'll give candy
Stranger: Pinkie promise as it were.
You: Ooooooh, you're goooood.
You: *Grins widely*
Stranger: Okay so what kind of candy do you want?
You: All of it?
Stranger: No.
You: Yes I do!
Stranger: To bad.
Stranger: I'm not giving it to you.
You: But you Pinkie Promised!
Stranger: I lied.
Stranger: *Starts eating candy*
You: WHAT?
You: You broke a PINKIE PROMISE!?
Stranger: Yes.
Stranger: I did.
You: *Jumps up to all four hooves and snorts!*
You: YOU BROKE A PINKIE PROMISE!
Stranger: *Backs away*
Stranger: Yes...I did.
You: *Stalks towards you, snorting, her eyes intently on you with a frown*
You: Yes, you... DID!
Stranger: I KNOW!
Stranger: *Smiles*
You: *Suddenly produces a meat cleaver from out of nowhere* And now YOU WILL PAY! *She rears up on her hindlegs over you, cleaver in hoof*
Stranger: WHAT THE HELL!?
Stranger: *Runs*
You: *Lunges down and cuts a Jelly Baby in half with the cleaver*
You: *Puts the cleaver away, and picks up the half a Jelly Baby.*
Stranger: *Stops and looks back*
You: *Looks after you where you ran to* That'll cost you HALF A JELLY BABY MISTER!
Stranger: .......
You: *Sits back on her haunches and pops the half a Jelly Baby into her mouth.*
You: *Munches* MMM, TASTY!
Stranger: *Starts to laugh*
You: *Looks at you strangely* What?
Stranger: I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHY I RAN!
Stranger: I mean look at you!
You: Well don't look at ME!
You: If you don't know WHO KNOWS?
Stranger: The worst you could have done to me was cut off some hairs.
You: Oh wait. Owlolicious?
Stranger: *Starts laughing harder*
You: No, no wait! Maybe Princess Luna knows!
You: Oh, no, no, Derpy! She knows EVERYTHING!
Stranger: *Stops laughing*
You: See? I'm right!
Stranger: *Looks at you*
You: *Tilts her head and lifts one hoof under her chin, rubbing it as she looks back at you*
You: *Squints*
Stranger: I'm not even going to ask.
Stranger: *Walks over to a blue phone booth*
You: I am!
You: Where you going? Huh, huh?
Stranger: My....traveling machine.
You: Oh, you're going on a trip!
Stranger: So to speak.
You: Neighagra Falls is really nice this time of year!
Stranger: *Opens door to phone booth*
You: And, ooo, ooo, you could go to VANHOOVER!
Stranger: I bet it is.
You: How about Canterlot?
Stranger: Nah.
You: Okay!
Stranger: How about anyplace but here.
You: Oh that sounds nice! HEY!
You: What are you trying to saaaay?
Stranger: ...
You: It DOES sound nice though. Can I come?
Stranger: *Walks into phone booth*
Stranger: No.
You: But?
You: Well fine if you want to be a mean meanie!
You: *Crosses her hooves*
Stranger: I'm not mean!
You: Well what do you mean?
Stranger: I'm....
Stranger: Responsible!
Stranger: Yes.
You: Really? Responsibility is my SECOND MIDDLE NAME!
You: Pinkamena Diane Responsibility Pie!
You: That's me!
You: Isn't that super?
Stranger: Well I'm sorry but you can't come along.
You: Really? *Looks inexplicably excited*
Stranger: It's to....umm....dangerous!
You: So you travel in that box?
Stranger: Yes.
Stranger: I can go anywhere.
You: So is it true that it's bigger on the inside than the outside?
Stranger: Yes.
You: Neat!
You: So it it true that it has a BATHROOM?
Stranger: Yes.
You: No way! I DON'T BELIEVE YOU!
You: Where does the plumbing go?
You: Well?
Stranger: III
Stranger: The plumbing goes into space.
You: Space doesn't have water in it silly!
You: It just has SPACE in it!
You: So you can't be pulling water in from space!
You: Bwaaaeeeee!
Stranger: Yeah well you can fun here I'm going back in time.
You: Okay! But the toilet is OUT OF ORDER!
You: Bye!
Stranger: How would you know?
You: Cause there's no water for it! DUH!
Stranger: *Steps out of the phone booth*
Stranger: Let me explain something to you.
You: Hmmmmmm?
Stranger: The toilet doesn't use water.
You: It DOESN'T?
Stranger: It uses...how can I but this?
Stranger: Sciencey wiencey things flush the toilet.
You: *Hops up to all fours and runs at breakneck speed into your TARDIS! You hear her calling from inside: "Which way is the BATHROOM?"*
Stranger: HEY!
Stranger: *Pulls you out*
You: *Screams and kicks and cries as you drag her back out*
You: But but but but....
Stranger: I don't want you in the machine!
You: Why not? Huh?
Stranger: You badly damage it!
Stranger: Or you could get hurtled into space!
You: *Gasps, appearing shocked that you'd accuse her of such a thing!*
Stranger: Or lost in time!
You: Oh! Twilight got lost in time once! It was FUN! Can we do it? Huh, huh?
Stranger: NO
Stranger: !
Stranger: We could badly damage the time line!
You: Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
You: Time's not a line, silly!
You: It's all complicated wibbly-wobbly stuff!
Stranger: ....
Stranger: YES!
You: What?
Stranger: And that's why you can't go in!
You: Ooooooohhhhhhhh......
You: I see now.
Stranger: *Starts spinning bow tie*
Stranger: Good.
You: Cause you can't deal with a pilot who knows more about time than you?
Stranger: WHAT!?
Stranger: WHAT?!
You: Well you thought it was a line! You just SAID so!
Stranger: ARE YOU SAYING I'M A BAD PILOT?!
You: *Wiggles her hoof* Eeeh, decent. I've seen better!
Stranger: I'LL SHOW YOU!
You: Okay!
You: *Runs back inside the TARDIS*
You: Let's go!
Stranger: NO!
Stranger: *Pulls you out again*
You: But you can't show me from out here, silly!
Stranger: I pretty sure I can!
You: This is gonna be a boring slideshow, isn't it?
Stranger: *Walks into Tardis and slams door behind me*
Stranger: NO!
You: Wait!
You: Where's the PROJECTOR?
Stranger: *Tardis disappears*
You: And the POPCORN?
You: This movie is LAME!
Stranger: *A smaller Tardis reappears*
Stranger: *The door opens*
Stranger: HA!
You: *Blinks, noticing the tiny TARDIS*
You: Oh hey! I'm BIGGER!
Stranger: I JUST TRAVELED INTO ANOTHER UNIVERSE FIVE SECONDS INTO THE FUTURE!
You: Yeah, so?
Stranger: That takes pretty good piloting!
You: You're the wrong size though! *blinks* Or am I?
Stranger: Actually I am currently in another universe.
You: Are you in a snowglobe?
Stranger: No.
Stranger: *Walks out*
You: Well that't the problem obviously!
Stranger: Better than you could do!
You: *Pulls an empty snowglobe out of nowhere and chases after you with it*
Stranger: *Stands still and looks at you*
Stranger: What trying to do?
You: *Notices you stopping and picks you up* Making things all pretty and right again! *She opens the bottom of the snowglobe with her other hoof and tries to stuff you in the hole*
Stranger: HEY!
Stranger: *Bangs against snowglobe*
You: What? I'll get you nice ornaments and stuff and feed you twice a day! Who do you think I am?
Stranger: LET ME OUT!
You: *Finishes stuffing you in the snowglobe and plugs the hole. She laughs a little as she turns it right side up*
You: Huh? Are you trying to say something? Can't hear through the glass, huh.
Stranger: *Yells in anger and starts banging the glass*
Stranger: LET ME OUT!
You: Oh, you're hungry already?
Stranger: What?
Stranger: No! Let me out!
You: *Goes over to your TARDIS and tries to get in. She can only get her nose inside though* Now where are those Jelly Babies he likes?
Stranger: *Sits down*
Stranger: *Pulls out jellybaby bag*
Stranger: You'll never find them.
You: *Turns around and comes back, frowing* HEY! Why were you banging for food if you already have it, huh? Silly pony!
You: Anyway you're safe now!
Stranger: I WAS BANGING TO GET OUT!
You: Somepony could have stepped on you and then you'd be a splat pony!
Stranger: YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE AROUND!
You: *Can't hear any what you're screaming*
You: Huh?
You: Uhm..
You: *Picks up the snowglobe and uncorks it to let you out* What'd you say?
Stranger: *Walks out*
Stranger: I was saying let me out.
You: Well I did!
You: Wow that was so smart of me! I couldn't hear you at all!
Stranger: *Backs away*
You: Hey, somepony should make glass that doesn't sound like... HEY WAIT!
You: What's wrong, TeenyPony?
Stranger: Oh nothing...
You: Oh! Okay. Can I have another Jelly Baby?
Stranger: *Starts heading to Tardis*
Stranger: Nope.
You: Pleeeeeeeasse?
Stranger: NOPE!
You: Well fine!
You: *Crosses her hooves*
Stranger: (I have to go)
You: ( Aww! This was great, thanks! )
Stranger: ( TA TA! )
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[Random Bald Guy]

lol wut ^